)(( hannah mello ))(

"facing the sea, listening" <>

the photo here is from a last summer over-the-cliff glance. camera in hand.

the title of this post is the last line in my favorite film's closing monologue.

the film? "life as a house".

the monologue?
"With every crash of every wave, I hear something now.
I never listened before.
I'm on the edge of a cliff, listening.
Almost finished.
If you were a house, Sam...
this is where you would want to be built.
On rock, facing the sea... listening."

the new dashboard confessional albulm is filling my ears. appreciating it molto.

SNAPSHOT:
this morning, my dad and i took a fast-paced walk down to the sea. the grey was above. the sea was brown. odd. a late night storm perhaps? as we crossed the street 8 meters before the crosswalk, the colors of the village along the sand became the feast of our eyes. such a good breakfast look. we climbed steps to the home of soy coconut lattes and blueberry muffins atop booth tables overlooking a river bridge and wave crashes. james taylor joined us. after a half hour of talking with a stranger and each other, the walk back reminded me of how sugar makes you feel the-hour-after. :) i'm so used to the purity of italiano expresso (as intense as it is :)...) and a spot of milk mixed in. cafe macciato. 0.80 euro cents. centessimi. love it. with the home-sitting, post-stretching, i have put hands to keys on this computer desk. there's something to the combination of thinking and communicating without delay. i've been writing to a friend, penning blog postings, and enjoying the flow.

oooh. 'the fray'. what's going on?! woah. i'm dying of joy.

LEARNING:
i've never been good at answering my own questions. i can ask questions to others really well, but when the 'and how about you?' comes back at me, i can't answer. a mental blank. i think it's really easy for me to be there when someone's being vulnerable-- pouring out their heart and responding to every drop-- but it's difficult for me to put myself out there. the sad thing is, once i don't take the opportunity to answer the question or be honest/open in general, the opportunity has passed-- and maybe won't be there again because i shut the door. i hate that. i guess good friends or one who is truly interested will always knock a second time. that's the hope i must rest in today. in the meantime, i have to keep learning.

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can i ask a question?
do you ever feel like you have NO IDEA what you feel on a given subject? what you REALLY feel, i mean. cause there's too many threads of feeling/emotion?

adulthood brings with it a wider world of experience, thinking, and relationship. however, with that width, comes needless intricacies. i wish the simplicity of childhood could be present in the wide world of adulthood.

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posted by )(( hannah mello ))( @ 2:48 PM