)(( hannah mello ))(

this particular now <<<.>>>

i feel a lump in my throat and a rise in my soul whenever i think about this generation. my generation. this slice of history. i can't escape it. there's something about the NOW of history-- a culture that has never before existed.

a culture of psychology (including neuro-psychology and its advances), travel (the ability to travel to and live in almost every single country in the world easily, although not necessarily safely), education (including the accessibility of knowlege on the internet alone, in addition to all the universities, colleges, higher education & specialist programs), politics (it will be INTERESTING to see what kind of politicians are birthed out of this generation. there's such disconnect from past thinking and methodology and such inescapable PROBLEMS and DISASTERS in every region of the world.), environmental dilemnas (global warming, the gas and oil crisis), social realities (starvation, disease). i'm sure you could add a ton more out of your study and experience too...

we are the souls housed in this particular microcosm. we are trying to find homeostasis in this place so different than our parents' habitat... and every other in history really. we're wishing for sages and gurus that are unpretentious. but we're over it.

this is an excerpt from a poem i wrote this past october from a very personal place (tied into my life experiences) of deepest soul.--> but there's a tie in to this subject i think.

"the times are unclear. i hate the grey.
i hate these states of being that cannot be advised—
sages, gurus, geniuses, strategists—all the wise human minds cannot and
will not lend a word that will break the pile."

and another bit:

"i don’t think promise is appropriately named.
i find it more to be a timeless fact than
a foretold reality to be evidenced in time.
i disagree with hope’s argument of linear process bringing promise with it.
vain hope—
pompous hope—
such shine you radiate—such seeming purity when
in fact, you are not trustworthy.
i have paid my last cent to you.
hope—
market to a new social group."

i'm listening to some of the songs from martin sexton's "live wide open"-- a play-on-words title cause it's both live and it's about living... i have the song "hallelujah" on repeat. the lyrics are rocking my world... met with the melody... please read them. listen to it on iTunes MusicStore if you can...

no, i'm not depressed. :) no, i'm not feeling hopelessness. :) no, i'm not in a pensive or melancholy mood. :) actually, it's been a great day. it's been a couple of extraordinary days actually. i guess i just feel my heart rising out of my chest as that "hallelujah" song is on repeat and as faces scroll in my head of other faces next to mine that are really trying to find themselves, god/spirituality, and each other in this unique slice of time and space.

such conversations over the last 7 days... with my cousin who now has a platform with her music to truly make a difference. with friends who are losing hope in their own futures and that opportunity exists for them at all. with a friend struggling through where she belongs location-wise in the world.

i took this post's photo in naples (the region of posillipo), struck by the graffiti of a single, bold, loud, significant question mark. ugh. i care so much. ... i want to give my life and my time to this slice of history... somehow... in many ways if possible. i care so much.

sure, i'm feeling the tensions of the 20-somethings i'm around and what defines that life stage <-- which is somewhat timeless. HOWEVER, there's something more there. hope has to show her face. without fresh light rays, life may shrivel.

what are your thoughts as you read this? what do YOU feel?
we're in this together. that's for sure.
:)

posted by )(( hannah mello ))( @ 3:07 PM